


And there was only one boat

by Ethereal_Soul



Category: The Lord of the Rings (Movies), The Lord of the Rings - All Media Types
Genre: Almost Drowning, Angst with a Happy Ending, Fellowship of the Ring, M/M, THERE WAS ONLY ONE BED, but it's super short, drama followed by apologies, except its a boat
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-01-19
Updated: 2021-01-19
Packaged: 2021-03-17 12:28:31
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,907
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28849074
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Ethereal_Soul/pseuds/Ethereal_Soul
Summary: Frodo's leaving without Sam and Sam goes after him. There was only one boat.
Relationships: Frodo Baggins/Sam Gamgee
Kudos: 23





	And there was only one boat

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you, M.!

He was drowning. Dying. The cold waters engulfed him. That's how it ends, he thought, dark and cold. After loosing the ground beneath his feet it was only going down, as if falling from a cliff without ever hitting the rocks.

He wouldn't die in vain. He'd promised Gandalf he'd never leave Frodo. Not that he ever needed a promise to do so, he was already eavesdropping on Frodo when the Gray Wizard changed his plans. Albeit not entirely. From that moment on he'd be with Frodo for better or for worse. No more being his gardner, no more watching from afar, no more of being too afraid to speak up and risk their friendship.

But he never spoke. Not even on his last breath. All he could do was to scream. Try to stop Frodo from leaving him behind, from walking towards his death alone. Frodo would never notice, he was too oblivious and the quest only made it worse. And Sam could never tell. Not when they had so many people arround them and counting on the ring bearer. He couldn't fail Frodo. Before, speaking up could risk their friendship. Now, if he ever confessed his feelings it would mean risking their quest. And he had promised he'd never leave him.

He knew he couldn't swim. No hobbit from the Shire ever had to learn. The rivers there were calm and the lakes not too deep. Swimming was only for those who feared the waters. So he knew he'd die now. But he'd die anyway, either on the depths of the waters or admist his feelings, left alone on the shore by the one he loved the most. 

Could he have taken another boat? If he was reasoning enough, perhaps, but not at his state. When he saw Frodo leaving the shore there was no water, no fear, only the desire to shorten the distance between them. The desire that had accompanied him throughout their journey and before. But Frodo hadn't come back to fetch him. Sure he meant well, but he should have realised that without him Sam would perish. 

After the seconds of despair fighting the waters, silence and darkness surrounded him. He was falling and floating at the same time. Numb, he could no longer feel the cold and no thoughts would ever cross his mind again.

*

It was painful, to feel the wind cut through his wet skin. Darkness was replaced by the blinding light of the day. Even if he could not open his eyes, he knew he had to breathe, to release the heaviness of the water sinking on his lungs. So he took a desperate breath. Attempted to. Midway through his breath the waters inside him came out. Between inhaling air and coughing water, Sam somehow could breath again. 

The first thing he saw was the river. He was bending towards the edge of the boat when a force pulled him back.

"Do you want to die!?" It was Frodo's voice. Sharp and clear. Not a dream.

"I told you to stay because it was dangerous and the next thing you do is drown yourself?" He had his hands over Sam's shoulders so he'd sit and not go closer to the water. "What have you done, Sam?" 

Frodo sat across from him and took the paddles. They needed to make distance from the shore, from the orcs, from the man that wanted the ring. 

Sam didn't utter a word. His body was focused on breathing. His eyes on Frodo. His friend didn't look at him. After the shouting and piercing him with his eyes while making sure Sam would be safe inside the boat, Frodo would avoid him. 

Now he had his friend, but Frodo was cross. And he had their quest. But he didn't have his backpack or food. Maybe some soaked lembas if they were still eatable. His provisions were left on the shore. But now they had miles and miles to sail.

And there was only one boat.

*

Soon night fell and Sam was stuck. What could he do? Words and actions had the potential to cut the thin thread that held their friendship together. By then he was paddling too. "Mr. Frodo, you need to rest. Let me take this alone for a while." Frodo looked at him. It shouldn't be hard to maintain the gaze but Sam could feel the weight of upsetting his friend. He expected Frodo to be glad he had Sam with him, relieved he was alive. But his eyes were as cold as Sam's bones.

That's when Sam realised he was not the only one that was soaked wet. Frodo had dived to save him. His bones should be hurting too. Their cloaks kept them warm, elves' magic, but they didn't make their undergarments dry. It glued fabric on their skin.

"My old mother would say we'd catch a cold if we kept wet clothes on, Mr. Frodo." Sam kept paddling and looked down. "You should dry yourself and sleep." Frodo raised his eyebrows. "And how do you suggest I do that, Sam?"

Sam let go of the paddles and went closer to Frodo, in an attempt to remove his cloak and twist the water out, but as soon as he stepped closer to him they felt the boat loose it's balance. "Let me do it alone, Sam." Frodo pushed him away. Back to his seat, Sam knew it would be long days untill they reached safe land. 

Frodo did remove everything but his trousers. Whether he was being unusually prudish or simply afraid to shake the boat, Sam couldn't tell.

Sam mimicked him. Hopefully they'd have their shirts dry by morning. "Sir, you need sleep".

"Yes, Sam, but if I lie down we might flip, did you think of that?"

"Sorry, sir." He paddled some more. "Sir, why don't we sit in the middle, our backs at the center and we face different directions, that must balance it out." Frodo had a skeptical look, but did as suggested. His skin was warm. That was unusual for Frodo, thought Sam. Most of the time, he was the one having to warm the his hand, to tell him to cover his feet. But he was warm now. As if not even his body needed Sam's assistance anymore.

"Mr. Frodo, I'm sorry 'bout today. I didn't mean to make you cross." Silence followed. "I couldn't leave you. You need to understand. I couldn't let you go alone."

"Why is that, Sam? Because you promised Gandalf, hm? You remind me everyday, you know, of that promise you made. Are you afraid he'll turn you into a creature? He's dead Sam, he can't turn you into anything, you're free from your promise. You can go back to the Shire now."

The moon was high on the sky, and the paddles were resting. The breathing sounds, often muffled by stepping on dry leaves or their provisions shaking on their backpacks, was all that could be heard.

Was Frodo hurt? Did he think I'd leave him after Gandalf was gone? That I'd have no reason to remain by his side? How can one think I'll go to mountain doom out of fear of a curse?

"Do you take me for a fool, Mr. Frodo? You should have let me drown then."

"I should never want you hurt, Sam!"

"Is that so? Then why are you so willing to let yourself die in mountain doom? Had I known you'd be so ungreatful I'd never have left the Shire!"

"You can go back, Sam, you should go back, it's safer."

"Maybe I should. You don't want me here with you. If I knew how to swim I'd walk all my way back."

"You know what, sir, I do respect you greatly. And I did promise Gandalf. He trusted me, Gandalf, to keep you out of trouble. You say you're brave and can go on alone, but if not for me that ring would be on your finger long ago and they'd have you by now. It's a promise I made myself too. To be with you. But Mr. Frodo, If you don't wish my help you should go to the shore and leave me there. As you say yourself, I'll be safer without you, won't I?"

"FINE! You want to leave you leave." He shifted in his seat. "Get back there. We'll paddle to the shore."

Both went back to their previous position. The awkwardness of deciding where to look returned. Sam had tears in his eyes, but no noise came out of him. The shadows did not do a good job hiding them, but there was no need for Frodo was fixed on the shore, his gaze passing through Sam.

"You really don't want me here, do you, Mr. Frodo?" Sam let out on a whisper as they approached the shore. The boat hit the sand and Sam gathered his shirt and cloak. Frodo didn't move until Sam motioned to leave. 

"I'm sorry, Sam. I'm sorry. I didn't mean to lash out at you earlier. Don't go into the wild, stay here." He came closer and rested his hand on Sam's tight. "You're my only friend, Sam. I was afraid you'd die, I was was afraid you'd die because of me. Forgive me, Sam."

"It's this thing, Mr. Frodo. It possesses you. There's nothing to be sorry about. But look me in the eyes and say you won't leave me."

Frodo took Sam's face between his hands. He was close enough to see his wet eyes. "I will not leave you, Samwise Gamgee, and you better not die because of me". Sam burried his face on Frodo's chest and wept. His hands clinging to Frodo's bare back until he came to his senses and felt the cold breeze.

"You should rest, Mr. Frodo. Sleep while I take watch."

Frodo did lie down. He looked at the stars above, aware that Sam was not watching the shadow of the trees but looking at him instead.

"Sam, the cloak must work against ill intentioned animals too, you can come and sleep."

The cloak did work. Both felt warm side by side. Sam's heartbeat had eased after the fight, but he swore Frodo could hear it. 

"They'll write songs about you, Mr. Frodo. About you protecting your friends and saving the Shire."

"Sam?"

"Yes, sir?"

"Why do you call me that?"

"What?"

"Why not call me Frodo?"

"I don't know, sir, it's the habit I guess. Does it bother you?"

"No... It just makes me feel... heavier, sometimes. Reminds me that with the burden of the ring came the responsibility to look after you. While you're the one who's keeping me safe instead." He turned to his side to face Sam, whose gaze was still upon the sky.

Frodo reached for Sam's chest, trying to feel his warmth. Sam felt the hesitant touch and turned towards Frodo, one hand on his back and the other reaching his cheeks.

"I'll take care of you, Mr. Frodo." His eyes stared at his lips, his fingers now tracing the perfect design. "If only you'll let me."

Frodo covered their faces with the cloak, shadows between their breaths keeping the chill outside. "I can never be cross at you, Sam. Don't let me push you away again, will you?"

Sam replied with a peck on his lips. "I won't, sir, now be quiet."

**Author's Note:**

> I just couldn't remove the voice in my head saying "and there was only one boat" after the end of the Fellowship. I'd appreciate if anyone knew something similar in this fandom to rec, I'd love to read it!


End file.
